Charlotte at 6 weeks old
The six things no one tells you!
1. Shots suck and it will traumatize you.
The doctor didn't even give her the shots. Two nurses came in the room after the doctor examined her and asked me to hold her arms above her head. I was making funny faces at her and trying to distract her while they both counted "1, 2, 3" and then stuck her in both legs with the needles. Umm, thanks for the warning, ladies. Charlotte immediately began screaming uncontrollably and I can't say I blame her. It was the worst and hardest she's ever cried. On the way out of the room, one nurse says to me, "You can feed her if you want, that sometimes helps." So there I am trying to breastfeed her in the horrible chair in the doc's office - no pillows, no nothing. Somehow she did calm down a bit and I was able to get her home OK. Future moms - prepare for this experience. People did warn me that she'd "be fussy" but no one told me it's literally the worst moment of your life as a mom to date. So you heard it from me.
2. Someone at some point will make an a-hole comment to you.
I'm not the kind of person to name name's or say exactly what was said to me, but at some point early on, someone will make a really rude, insensitive remark that will make you want to punch their lights out. My advice - don't take it personally. People can be idiotic and thoughtless. Most likely they either don't understand what you're going through, or they think they are being helpful. Either bite your tongue and politely smile and nod, or hit them with what you are really thinking. Maybe that person will think twice before making another a-hole remark to a new mom.
3. Don't schedule a massage past 6 months of pregnancy, but schedule one for 6 weeks post-delivery.
I think I was 7 or 8 months pregnant when I told Sam I needed a massage because my back was killing me. Even though the masseuse was gentle it was still impossible to lay on my belly comfortably. I did get a massage this week and it was amazing. Definitely schedule a "mom night out" around the 6 week mark to maintain sanity and alone/relaxation time just for you. A hair or nail appointment or even grabbing a glass of wine with a friend will really help.
4. Breastfeeding is hard and a full-time job.
When you're pregnant everyone asks if you plan on breastfeeding. My response was always, "I'm going to give it a shot." And I sincerely have been trying my absolute best since I know it's wonderful for Charlotte and the best thing for babies. But let me tell ya, there are days I want to quit. There are days when I ask myself, "Is it really worth it?" Maybe for some mom's the breastfeeding thing gets off to a great start and stays that way. Since I was separated from Charlotte after birth and wasn't allowed to nurse her for 24 hours, we had a more difficult beginning to the process. Maybe that's why it's been more challenging for us. I know from talking with a few friends they only lasted for 3 months doing it, and now I can understand why. My advice - keep at it, even when you're having a bad day. Don't feel guilty if you need or want to stop or have a day where you need to supplement with some formula. And most of all, don't let anyone make you feel bad about how you choose to feed your baby.
5. There will come a point when your house looks like a dump truck drove through it and you'll want to hire a maid.
I'm at that point right now. My house is literally a disaster zone and I honestly don't have the energy to care. If you have friends or family that ask how they can help, tell them to come over and clean. And then tell them you're serious.
6. Your dog will become your best friend.
When I was pregnant people asked me how I thought my dog (Bruiser) was going to handle the baby. I honestly didn't know. He's a guard dog with some aggression issues, but he absolutely loves our immediate families. Somehow Bruiser just gets it. I don't know how, and I don't know if every dog is this way, but he knows when I'm about to have a mental breakdown, and will either come and lay at my feet, or just leave me alone. The other day after Charlotte had a very fussy period of crying, my husband stepped in to calm her down, sensing I was at a delicate moment. I went and simply laid on the floor next to Bruiser and just pet him for a few minutes. It was very relaxing and therapeutic. I know he enjoyed getting a few moments of undivided attention from mom, too.
Bruiser and I back in the day -- I think this was in 2009.
Alright, that about covers it for the six things I've learned in the 6 weeks since having Charlotte. I'm sure there's a lot more to come...stay tuned!
Thanks for reading!
I think there's a 9 lb. peanut on my sofa!
